6:00 am

Well its Friday morning and I'm finally starting this entry. I wish I was sleeping in. Sleep hasn't really been working out for me for the last week or so. I would actually go so far as to say that this has been probably the worst week of my life. It's only getting worse.

Let's go back to Friday night one week ago. Excited that my boyfriend is coming home from his school camping retreat and that I get to hang out with him, I actually end up getting dumped. Did I mention that this was through a text message? What about that we had been together for a little over a year and a half? I probably also forgot to tell you that this whole time I was at work. Yeah, that was basically the greatest night ever.

The thing with my boyfriend (oops ex-boyfriend*) is that we get in little tiffs all the time so I was sure this was workable and that it would all be solved in a matter of hours. I was wrong because it's a week later and he still can barely force himself to talk to me. Not to mention the constant talking to new girls and his rekindled friendship with a kid who has worked his butt off to mess so much up between the two of us for absolutely no reason. And I still want to get back together with him? It's confusing for me too. I want to have my relationship back but I'm not quite sure if I would even be able to jump back into it after all of this b.s. I love the kid...a lot, but as far as maturity is concerned he doesn't have it and that's probably where stuff went wrong from the start. He doesn't quite understand that there are consequences to his actions and that if he does something wrong I will get mad and cry or even give him a piece of my mind. He thinks I'm just being unreasonable and psycho but he needs to understand that if something wasn't wrong on his part I wouldn't be saying anything to begin with. Enough about this. I'd love to go on longer just as my own little outlet of emotions but I feel like no one signed up to read about my dysfunctional relationship. For the record, it wasn't all that bad.

Secondly, I've decided that my decision to enroll in the graphic design program at school was a less than good idea. Let's just say I have no idea how I'm going to fix that at this point. I'm a non-artist in an artistic program.

Besides those things I've been working out the wazoo since my place of employment decided to not hire any new employees when a few current ones left for the school year. In fact they went as far as to fire one more. So now I am required to "help my manager out". I've also been feeling extremely sick. I'm officially broke. My car broke down on my lunch date with my ex. He ended up walking back to school while I sat and waited an hour to be picked up and then another hour while they put in a new battery. I missed all my classes that day and to be completely honest I barely have it in me to show up even when I'm perfectly capable. At this point life looks a little better under the covers in my bed.

The Starting Line

I guess you could say I'm a little new to this whole blogging thing and to be completely honest I have no idea on what to write. I've actually never really been good at starting anything. It's always the most difficult part. Ever since I was young I was unusually talented when it came to reading and writing. I've always been sort of "gifted" academically in most subjects for that matter. The biggest problem I had was that I never really applied myself. I'm the kind of kid that tends to procrastinate and I'm awful at coming up with spur of the moment ideas. I love having the freedom to write about whatever I want but it takes me hours to pick a topic. For that reason I'm also the kid who needs a lot of direction because when I don't have it I just don't feel like trying. As soon as I get started with something though I'm on a roll and I no longer feel like I'm attempting some insurmountable task.
I'm hoping all of this gets easier with time and I find some niche I can start writing comfortably about. I actually want to know what kinds of junk everyone else wants to hear about. I'm sure I have plenty of life stories I could go on about but for me its all about keeping you interested and I'm sure that leaves me with plenty of different demographics that I'm attempting to entertain. Of course that means I won't be able to please everyone and a few of you probably won't give a crap or possibly just flat out hate the things I post. That's okay though. As much as I'd like to think my purpose here is to keep you interested, it's really all meant for my growth as a writer. If I manage to make you laugh, cry, or maybe even piss you off in the process then all the better for me.
Throughout this I know I need to find out my own writing style but I'm anticipating that it will end up being a lot like my mother's. At least I hope that's the case. She's very witty yet at times she can be quite raw, deep, and even depressing. Even her Facebook statuses are a masterpiece. Everyone who is her friend on there looks forward to their daily dose of Amy. It's generally pretty pee-your-pants-worthy. (My apologies to anyone who is made to feel awkward easily. My brain doesn't really grasp that.) Well enough about my mom, I just felt I should say she's my inspiration and for that reason you should all take a look at her blog.
Now that I've covered all the boring stuff I think I'll rant for a while. Right now I'm procrastinating and it's really pretty terrible. I have a lovely drawing project due tomorrow and I lack the capability of moving my hand on paper and actually making it look like something recognizable. So instead I sit here watching food network, Iron Chef to be exact, and being extremely disgusted by the pile of about 50 suckling pigs that need to be incorporated into their dishes. It's enough to make me go back to being a vegetarian. Good thing I made pancakes for supper and I don't have to think about it for a while. Did I mention I'm procrastinating? At least I'm finishing this up. Then I'll be off to clean my bathrooms, do the dishes, and clean the litter box. Why yes, I am a cat person. Don't talk to me about how cats are gross and dogs are better. I disagree and I'd rather have a band aid and some neosporin from an unpredictable cat then a face reconstruction surgery from an unpredictable dog. I've realized that most of this has lost all structure and I am doing exactly what I said...ranting.
I think I've covered quite a bit for tonight and maybe next week you'll get my ultra-exciting life story. Hopefully you made it all the way through this thing and hopefully I find some interesting things of yours to read. Now I'd really like to make my way to "dreamland" but it looks like I've got some chores to finish. Until next time, have a fabulous time in the blogging world.